I tend to make and create trouble for myself most of the time. This time around too, I think I have done it again. Firstly, the fault with me is that I tend to trust people and their actions too much and forget that there is a variety of people in this world who to get ahead and make the other peers feel low, would do anything. I am not sure whether they realize it or not, but they do tend to do things which would infuriate the person, but gain ground for them.
I have grown up in an environment where we tend to place trust in all those who are around us. Over the years I have developed a certain inner voice which sends across the vibes to me when a person might be good or have bad intentions. (although, I must say, my social heart seems to prevail over my intuitive mind everywhere) The Army is a place where you have to make a move almost every 2-3 years. This develops in you a certain trait which might be called intuition where you just just the face and expressions of the person seem to make out whether he would be a friend or a foe. Added to this my Cancerian nature, and I come across as a intuitive softy. So, although I know that the person is a squealer and not trust worthy, if I have developed a friendship with the person, I tend to become soft and show concern with him/her.
This is what has lead to the predicament/soup in which I have landed myself into now. I shouldn’t feel sorry for myself, but do so and also for the others who have got effected by my this nature.
Also, there are things which are making me go towards a path which I do not wish to tread on. I have started making up things to please the person with whom I am talking to. I get this feeling of having an uncanny sense, where I know what the person wants and to please that person, I start making up things which would make the person happy and content rather than angry.
Am I insecure and just want to be surrounded by people who come to me for advice and expressing their thoughts? The Leon head rearing up mixed with the Cancerian concern and caring nature??!! I need to take care of this, as it is something I don’t think I would like…